tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47141909844518384802024-03-20T08:42:39.517-07:00Suite MoviesNickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-49173985163670921002011-10-11T23:39:00.000-07:002011-10-11T23:43:24.743-07:00"This is a very complicated case, Maude. You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, a lotta what-have-yous."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Archive/?action=view&current=Lebowski-Walkman.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Archive/Lebowski-Walkman.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-13784935865244869332011-10-03T19:46:00.000-07:002011-10-03T19:48:39.702-07:00"Hey kid, you want a toothpick?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Drive.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Drive.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-28712706850377337242011-04-27T23:36:00.000-07:002011-04-27T23:39:04.054-07:00"The product was a drug, a tranquilizer called 'Ephemerol'."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Archive/?action=view&current=Scanners-Demo.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Archive/Scanners-Demo.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-1254590129900805662011-04-25T18:48:00.000-07:002011-04-25T18:50:11.853-07:00"You'll forgive me if I don't stay around to watch. I just can't cope with the freaky stuff."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Videodrome-Visor.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Videodrome-Visor.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-23909696247416121102011-04-22T14:54:00.000-07:002011-04-22T14:57:13.314-07:00"Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Airplane-Otto.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Airplane-Otto.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-91965566075329586492011-04-19T19:34:00.000-07:002011-04-19T19:42:25.822-07:00"They took from their surroundings what was needed and made of it something more."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Primer-Timer.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Primer-Timer.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-88872473306621654572011-04-18T22:42:00.000-07:002011-04-18T22:43:36.930-07:00"No, he's a sex offender. With a record. He served 6 months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Lebowski-Jesus.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Lebowski-Jesus.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-70343235941548017162011-04-14T21:47:00.000-07:002011-04-14T21:49:58.728-07:00"You think you can get the straight, maybe break some deserving teeth?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Brick-Den.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Brick-Den.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-91269034517147356202011-04-13T00:08:00.000-07:002011-04-13T00:09:01.352-07:00"Is white guilt supposed to make me forget that I run a business?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Jackie-Brown-Cherry.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Jackie-Brown-Cherry.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-54549435213246662552011-04-11T20:03:00.001-07:002011-04-11T20:03:59.710-07:00"The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Lebowski-Bath.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Lebowski-Bath.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-91029128967237895922011-04-07T19:59:00.000-07:002011-04-07T20:00:10.357-07:00" I should send you to Crenshaw Pete with his hot-ass coat hangers, bitch. Would you like that?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Black-Dynamite-Bitches.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Black-Dynamite-Bitches.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-47299828223128201852011-04-06T19:56:00.000-07:002011-04-06T20:00:55.338-07:00"I just don't think I can continue to live in a place that embraces and nurtures apathy as if it was virtue."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Seven-Box.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Seven-Box.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-74299851010770070132011-04-05T00:13:00.000-07:002011-04-05T00:18:07.638-07:00"How do you shoot the Devil in the back? What if you miss?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Usual-Suspects-Lineup.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Usual-Suspects-Lineup.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket" /></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-61931485397198934272011-04-01T15:21:00.000-07:002011-04-01T16:17:05.543-07:00"I didn't know you liked The Delfonics.."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Jackie-Brown-Car.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Jackie-Brown-Car.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket" /></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-17568023943246452322011-03-31T14:18:00.000-07:002011-03-31T17:47:22.729-07:00"You're looking at a Boeski, a Jim Brown, a Miss Daisy, two Jethros and a Leon Spinks, not to mention the biggest Ella Fitzgerald ever."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Oceans_Bar_GIF.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Oceans_Bar_GIF.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-6363642282721551162011-03-30T23:11:00.000-07:002011-03-30T23:41:33.598-07:00"If the police don't defend us, maybe we ought to do it ourselves."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Death-Wish-Newspaper.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Death-Wish-Newspaper.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-23398485845410773132011-03-30T23:08:00.000-07:002011-03-30T23:26:09.023-07:00"Outlaws wear black. Fags and cocaine dealers wear white."<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=MGD.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/MGD.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-24669840537522903822011-03-30T23:06:00.000-07:002011-03-30T23:25:38.687-07:00"Can't cut anyone's balls off with trimmers now, can I?"<a href="http://s1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/?action=view&current=Rock_Haircut.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1204.photobucket.com/albums/bb413/nagroc/Suite%20Movies/Rock_Haircut.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-3736508946030155382011-03-13T23:45:00.000-07:002011-03-14T00:46:12.277-07:00Battle: Los Angeles<span class="Apple-style-span"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVWQVivzqXy3jTT_7ESsFjckhVxR4U3aSBzPtIn-Qfat1JlcHnWOutz-chJAfNjvGm03mmEJ6JcIxbYl4ZXVjcYcZvo0ihJi7drKrgkBgYn5Ib-B-G747vs5PuPBgbruZRd2VbqlVIDnY/s1600/battle-los-angeles-poster1.jpeg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 136px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVWQVivzqXy3jTT_7ESsFjckhVxR4U3aSBzPtIn-Qfat1JlcHnWOutz-chJAfNjvGm03mmEJ6JcIxbYl4ZXVjcYcZvo0ihJi7drKrgkBgYn5Ib-B-G747vs5PuPBgbruZRd2VbqlVIDnY/s200/battle-los-angeles-poster1.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5583823943218536482" /></a>
<br /><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=UTF-8"> <meta equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css"> <title></title> <meta name="Generator" content="Cocoa HTML Writer"> <meta name="CocoaVersion" content="1038.32"> <style type="text/css"> p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 12.0px Helvetica; min-height: 14.0px} p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: justify; font: 12.0px Helvetica} span.s1 {text-decoration: underline} </style> </span><p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">Well goddamn, it's been near two years since we've updated last, but this year's rush of summer flicks is officially here, so we figured it's a good time to get off our asses and plop down in those sticky theater seats..</span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">This summer brings with it a record amount of sequels/remakes: twenty fucking seven, up from twenty-four from 2003 [<i>LOTR: Return of the King</i> took home the Oscar for Best Picture lolz]. That being said, we were hoping <i>Battle: Los Angeles</i> [does anyone know what the official title of this fucking movie is?!] was going be to one of the few fairly original flicks to release in 2011. But we sort of forgot this movie was being touted as a "<i>Black Hawk Down</i> meets <i>Independence Day</i>" action flick for over a year now. Woops. But hey, we love Ridley Scott, Will Smith, militainment, alien motherships, and a little Jeff Goldblum never hurt anyone, right? </span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">The beginning of <i>Battle: LA</i> [??] has a slightly effective front bookend to setup the entire film: August 12, 2011 is the day Los Angeles and the entire planet is attacked by an unknown combatant. The quickstart skips a lengthy setup a la Emmerich's opus and abruptly throws us onto a CH-53 transport with a bunch of Marines freaking out, unidentified objects are making crazy donut clouds in atmo, and Aaron "I make my own luck" Eckhart looks like someone shit in his cereal. But just as quickly as everything spooled up, we're timestamped 24 hours prior to "contact." </span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">Now personally I'm a big fan of using this technique to establish a sense of urgency or clarify where the hell we are in the world [<i>Spy Game</i>!!], but it's easy to over do it for no reason whatsoever. We never leave Santa Monica for two hours and there aren't <i>that</i> many characters to keep track of, on top of the fact that the time/textstamps are used haphazardly. By the time the third act hits, Marines are dropping left and right and it's quite difficult to tell if "Ruiz" or "Harris" or "Guerrero" just took a round to the face and I don't think the viewer needs to be told repeatedly that our Marine unit is trying to get back to their "Forward Operating Base or F.O.B."</span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">That aside, the 24 hour jump in time allows us to get a nice little glimpse at our main players before they're deployed in two weeks. Not surprisingly, the cast is made up of the usual suspects: one Marine Lieutenant is a soon to be father and this is his first time leading a squad into combat, "damn I look good in Marine issue corrective lenses" Ne-Yo is about to get hitched, some rookie who can't hold his booze when in the company of San Diego golf course skanks worries about whether he has what it takes to be a Marine, and Harvey Two-Face realizes he's an old fart with bad knees and is ready to say goodbye to the Marine Corps after returning from Iraq having lost a few of his men. And then aliens attack and the shit hits the proverbial fan. </span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">All things considered this was a great action flick. True it had a funky start, but it balanced character development, didn't go overboard with the CG [Read: Skyline], and the combat sequences are top notch. Sound design was also well done. Stalker alien clicking noises [no, not like a predator goddamn it] was creepy as hell. Unfortunately, this movie could not decide on a cinematic style; one second it uses <i>BSG</i>-style zooms for dramatic effect, then you're POV-ing through a firefight in a suburban neighborhood, or you're staring down an ACOG-scope through a smokey alley at Glenn-the-dog. A little more consistency would have been nice; more than once I was concerned more about how many Sour Patch Kids I was down to as opposed to how our heroes were going to survive. Also, Michelle Rodriguez looks good in digital camo. </span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">Once you have a better grasp that this flick is more <i>Black Hawk Down</i> than <i>ID4</i> with a hint of <i>Cloverfield</i> and <i>Saving Private Ryan</i> to boot, you're good to go. <i>Battle</i> chooses not to focus on aliens attacking or why [this is simply a narrative setup], but rather on the Marines themselves and how they respond to a faceless invader intent on world annihilation. If you aren't a fan of fun action chockfull of predictable Marine jargon ["Toss me another mag! Make it count!" "First in, last out!" Hoorah!" "I'll see you on the beach!" Oop.. maybe not that last one..] go check out <i>Mars Needs Moms</i> instead. </span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">One final tidbit we took away from today's adventure: We were not expecting <i>Battle Los Angeles</i> [??] to be such a Marine recruitment film; I mean it's not as bad as the Transformers franchise, but damn do they make the Marines look badass; quite possibly another product of the Hollywood/American Armed Forces Propaganda Machine. Semper Fi. And with that…</span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p1"><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">1. Have aliens never heard of flak guns before?</span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">2. Can Michael "I love to racism, bro!" Pena really shoot an M4 like a boss?</span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">3 Are Abrams tanks really that ineffective against alien threats?</span></p> <p class="p2"><span class="Apple-style-span">4. Was that moneyshot joke really necessary?</span></p> <p class="p1">
<br /></p>Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-83256383460217785402009-04-21T17:38:00.000-07:002009-04-21T19:09:07.838-07:00Observe and Report<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUZFARCKGslt0hJCGJam-9Di5xv2EbTA8VTm__f8-YpKIlvuwIgzZTpQnPCJj68o3Rb8Nr7gwnhvyaETLw8UVz2mU7lw3WQGYfrAl7O9uF67w-m3PMia5tFaXoSG8b13IhpyFATn40eZo/s1600-h/observe_and_report_xlg.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 141px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUZFARCKGslt0hJCGJam-9Di5xv2EbTA8VTm__f8-YpKIlvuwIgzZTpQnPCJj68o3Rb8Nr7gwnhvyaETLw8UVz2mU7lw3WQGYfrAl7O9uF67w-m3PMia5tFaXoSG8b13IhpyFATn40eZo/s200/observe_and_report_xlg.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5327309360864027010" border="0" /></a><br />Let's pretend like we haven't been reading about Seth Rogen's new flick <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> for the past few months... Based on the trailer that's been making rounds on the internet and from various TV spots, we've come to a few conclusions:<br /><br />1. It's a laugh riot.<br />2. It 's a laugh riot with Seth Rogen.<br />3. It's a laugh riot with Seth Rogen as a mall security cop.<br /><br />Pretty straightforward, eh? Well, it's not quite as cookie cutter as you might think. For one, <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> is not about Rogen chasing down your typical skateboarder mall rats, looking for love in all the wrong places [read: beauticians jocking the cosmetics counter], and catching the usual pervert flashing his junk at unsuspecting women in the mall parking lot. Well, it is, but that's not what makes it such an interesting watch. Instead of just making a more adult- themed Paul Blart family comedy, Jody Hill [writer/director, natch] has finally blindsided the public with a cinematic curve ball we're sure most moviegoers aren't ready for.<br /><br />Jody Hill 101: In the year 2006, Mr. Hill broke into the comedy scene with the stunning debut that was <span style="font-style: italic;">Foot Fist Way</span>. You may remember it's lead, one Danny "I'm trying to put tiger balm on this jungle's nuts" McBride? The movie was such a cult hit that Will Farrell started circulating the dvd around the Hollywood comedy elite, whom I can only assume has nothing better to do than pass around funny dvds to each other. With Farrell as his new backer, Mr. Hill started writing a little TV show called <span style="font-style: italic;">Eastbound and Down</span>, also starring Danny "maybe your wife's gonna buttfuck someone tonight" McBride. With the help of <span style="font-style: italic;">Pineapple Express</span> director David Gordon Green, the show received a considerable amount of praise and has recently been renewed for a second season on HBO. What can we learn from all of this? Two things: first, Will Farrell is either a fucking genius or has too much time on his hands; second, Jody Hill has begun a mini movie revolution that is just barely making itself known to the greater movie watching population.<br /><br />As Riley Freeman would put it, "I don't want to dick ride or nuthin," but Jody Hill's cranked out some pretty epic material in the past few years. In a world where I can't go see a funny movie in the theater without it somehow being connected to Judd Apatow, I'm ready for a breath of fresh air.* This pretty much gets us back to <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> and the shifting zeitgeist of movies that aren't written by a Segel, Rogen, Goldberg, or an Apatow. Or all of them at once. Oh wait, that was called <span style="font-style: italic;">Knocked Up</span>. Nevermind.<br /><br />We wouldn't call Seth Rogen's performance in <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> spectacular, but we will congratulate the man on avoiding a rehash of his previous character type, that of a well-meaning, yet somehow unmotivated twenty something Jewish male who doesn't quit with the funnies. His portrayal of a mentally ungrounded manic depressive is captivating, entertaining, and quite disturbing. Since you won't find a review of this movie without some mention of how it's just like <span style="font-style: italic;">Taxi Driver</span>, we'll join the band wagon too. By the end of the flick, you're gonna see some real shit go down. Hard drug use? Check. Questionable post-tequila shot coital relations? Check. Unnecessary yet completely appreciated gunplay/talk? Double check. This flick has it all, and it's not because Jody Hill is fishing for laughs. He's really trying to fuck with your brain and if you aren't even a little thrown off by the end of Rogen's ridiculous 1 hour, 40 minute downward spiral, then we'd like to shake your hand [note: this is not a direct invitation for you to shake our hands; we're just trying to make a point]. We were left wondering how Jody Hill convinced a major studio to green light this fucker, but hey, we're glad it got a wide release.<br /><br />Perhaps it's time for the movie watching public to know that there is an alternative out there ready to satiate their comedic desires. Maybe they're ready to have their brains stimulated by original content without foregoing a thoroughly entertaining movie experience. It's possible that the continual Apatow bombardment will end and we'll get something fresher as a result. Or we could be entirely wrong and we just wasted the last few moments of your life. No matter, <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> got a good response out of us. Check it out. You might be surprised. And with that,<br /><br />1. Is lithium really a good party drug?<br />2. Can an alcoholic actually keep his/her shit together by switching from hard liquor to beer?<br />3. Is Aziz Ansari's dick really brown?<br /><br /><br />* To be clear, I do not consider <span style="font-style: italic;">Observe and Report</span> an Apatow flick for a few reasons. Seth Rogen is the Apatow golden calf, yes, but Jody Hill has done a great job of keeping him reigned in, avoiding all of that improv business Kevin Smith couldn't quite quell in <span style="font-style: italic;">Zack and Miri Make A Porno</span>. Despite McBride's attachment to the Apatow crew in a recent Vanity Fair article, his relations to Jody Hill are closer and his breakthrough was not a direct result of <span style="font-style: italic;">Freaks and Geeks </span>getting cancelled.Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-52227389357158727462009-03-05T09:44:00.000-08:002009-03-05T15:19:33.466-08:00Watchmen<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVNT2i3ae6-yPEBUGv8TO4tXoatLUd3cRdmDeKACgxvb1kFbMnXRCjBvS2p_kClajW1OAZRJ7u84VV2cAp2rJ270nH-2DueZxgefjBEAgX4eut2l2c6J9zTFBIErNR_PbpFsio78YHK-k/s1600-h/watchmen.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 129px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVNT2i3ae6-yPEBUGv8TO4tXoatLUd3cRdmDeKACgxvb1kFbMnXRCjBvS2p_kClajW1OAZRJ7u84VV2cAp2rJ270nH-2DueZxgefjBEAgX4eut2l2c6J9zTFBIErNR_PbpFsio78YHK-k/s200/watchmen.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5309761707065389090" border="0" /></a><br />All right. Despite the ridiculous push and shove that's expected with big studio legal nightmares [Warner and Fox, we're looking at you...] the day has finally arrived [a few days early for us just because we're always doing it big]: probably the most hyped movie of 2009, <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span>, hits theaters this weekend across the country causing every fanboy within 10 feet of an ethernet connection to wet himself.<br /><br />After a quick meal of deep fried chicken and biscuits we grabbed our tickets, found some nice seats mid-left of the theater and waited until the lights went down and the show began, and boy what a show it was. After a quick and modest DC/Watchmen title flash we're thrown into the middle of a dark living room watching television with one of the film's main characters checking out the various talk shows and commercials from an alternate 1985 the movie takes place in. Now, if you've read the graphic novel you know what's about to go down: the front door gets kicked in, a brutal ass beating takes place, and our fellow TV watcher gets thrown out of a 10 story window. Zoom in on a bloody smiley face pin and voila! you've got the first few minutes of <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span>. The title sequence that follows is very impressive and it gives the viewer a little glimpse of the strange world The Watchmen used to patrol up until a government act outlawed costumed vigilantism. This is pretty much where the rest of the movie picks up, exploring the reason why said TV watcher was given an impromptu flying lesson and what this means for the rest of the world.<br /><br />We won't go into all the nitty gritty themes/subplots that unfold throughout <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span> [there's too much to get through and we're too lazy] but we will say this: the movie's a great cinematic experience, even if it is considered a "comic book flick" with funny superheroes walking around talking like Christian "I'm gonna fucking kick your fucking ass" Bale's Batman. What this film does well is throw you a curve ball mucking up what you think a comic book movie should look like. Plus there's tons of explosions, sexy chicks in tight latex, your usual Zack Snyder super slo-mo action sequences, and oh yeah.. Mickey from <span style="font-style: italic;">Seinfeld</span> shows up midway through the film as a disgruntled prison inmate. Oh, that reminds us...<br /><br />Warning: there are quite a few scenes that'll make even the slightly squeamish run for the loo or the theater next to you that's playing <span style="font-style: italic;">Fired Up</span>. This movie's rated R for a good reason, so don't let your 12 year old convince you that it's all fun and games with Ace and Gary running around fighting crime.<br /><br />To recap: Zack Snyder's <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span> is a visual attack on your eyes, but in a good way [fuck you Speed Racer]. The man's devoted a lot of time to make sure this movie doesn't skimp on the special effects and it definitely shows. Unfortunately, this means that a lot of the character development doesn't quite happen and it hurts this film because the reason it's such a big deal is because the characters are what make the story work in the first place. Yes, it's action packed, yes they're trying to prevent the end of the world, but without the human element the entire film suffers. You're left feeling confused about why you should care about the film's characters at all and in the end, there's just a little something missing. Not to say that this ruins Watchmen altogether, it's just what happens when you take one medium and try to transpose one of its most sacred works to film. That and some of the musical choices make you scratch your head for a few seconds.<br /><br />The film's cast includes Billy "Prefontaine" Crudup, Malin "shotgun anus!" Akerman, Matthew Goode, Jackie "try to get out of this one Macgyver!" Earle Haley, TV extraordinaire Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Patrick "I'm a dumb homeowner" Wilson, and Carla "I hate Ari Gold" Gugino. Directed by Zack Snyder [Dawn of the Dead remake, 300]. And with that,<br /><br /><br />1. Do multiple Dr. Manhattan's in bed qualify as a menage a trois?<br />2. What the hell does a tachyon really do?<br />3. Am I wrong or did Veidt own a goddamn Liger?<br />4. Is a flash fryer really the best weapon to deter a prison shanking?Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-41386996727934117882008-12-25T22:16:00.000-08:002008-12-25T22:20:21.032-08:00Milk<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh12q4FsgDyrZFJKiJC2yC7UTiptCCEDerD8i_1qgKZEgBskq3uZn89lMXuqaD37WbPAyHdhYiHWQ-BQRp6llvhzciB3ZozNDax_HRrBb8axDAXjuAFBBYlao928LGzUqcet2oBEXWRaaI/s1600-h/milk.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 143px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh12q4FsgDyrZFJKiJC2yC7UTiptCCEDerD8i_1qgKZEgBskq3uZn89lMXuqaD37WbPAyHdhYiHWQ-BQRp6llvhzciB3ZozNDax_HRrBb8axDAXjuAFBBYlao928LGzUqcet2oBEXWRaaI/s200/milk.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5283979648203548002" border="0" /></a>Towards the end of the year it's not surprising to see the number of decent flicks in theaters dwindle. However, 2008 has a nice little spread of films to suit most anybody's needs. In the mood for a touchy feely movie you can take the whole family to see? Check out <span style="font-style: italic;">Marley & Me</span>. What if you're leaning more toward shit blowing up, guns, and cleavage galore? Frank Miller's <span style="font-style: italic;">The Spirit</span> has got you covered. How 'bout something for the indie lover? Check out <span style="font-style: italic;">Frost/Nixon</span> or <span style="font-style: italic;">Milk</span>, two historically centered flicks highlighting the political climates of the past helmed by two very accomplished directors: Ron "don't you dare call me 'ginger'" Howard and Gus "bitch, I made <span style="font-style: italic;">Good Will Hunting</span>" Van Sant, respectively. As you might have guessed by now, I happened to catch Van Sant's <span style="font-style: italic;">Milk</span> before hightailing it out of New England for a more optimal climate (read: California).<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Milk</span> is a wonderful biopic about the life and times of one Harvey Milk (played by Sean "Spicoli" Penn), the first openly gay elected public official who held office in San Francisco's Castro District in 1978 until his assassination (sorry if I ruined the ending of the movie there, but come on, it's history people) along with Mayor George Moscone. The movie begins with Harvey relaying his experiences as a gay citizen, public official hopeful, and finally as a powerful symbol of human rights to a tape recorder, a lovely storytelling device that holds this flick together, especially when Gus' flick needs some roping in. But I'll get to that a little later... The movie transitions relatively smoothly from past to present, giving us a nice deep look at Harvey's motivations for putting himself in the limelight, making himself a target for praise and condemnation.<br /><br />The cast is rounded out by James "Fuck Jeff Goldblum" Franco, Emile "I made out with Elisha Cuthbert" Hirsch, Diego "why did I make <span style="font-style: italic;">Havana Nights</span>?" Luna, and Josh "I've come a long way since <span style="font-style: italic;">Hollow Man</span>" Brolin. The supporting characters in this movie are fleshed out perfectly, complimenting and accentuating Harvey Milk's down-to-earth, "why can't we all just get along?" rationale, although I must say Diego Luna's portrayal of Harvey's Spanish lover inadvertently made me forever hate his whiny bitch of a soul. I digress. The acting in this movie is superb and despite the obvious amount of artistic freedom taken with the historical parts of the film, you really do feel like you're privy to the most private of moments in these characters' lives. The acting is a little too good, one might say. <span style="font-style: italic;">Milk</span> is an emotional rollercoaster and I wouldn't be surprised if the usual moviegoer lets loose some waterworks throughout the movie. Just be happy it wasn't a cute cuddly dog with a red bow making you cry like a little girl with a scraped knee (although that's completely acceptable too, you big man baby you).<br /><br />Although I enjoyed Gus Van Sant's film very much, I did have a few problems with it. Throughout the movie, Gus likes to utilize normal film stock, found footage from 1978, and mock-footage that's either filtered or filmed with super grainy high speed film in black and white. This accomplishes a nice effect, although Gus cuts from each film type in a very haphazard manner, making for a confusing experience. Perhaps this is supposed to blur the line between timeframes or between Harvey's political and personal life, but it does throw off the spectator more than a few times. Nonetheless, I did embrace the theme of documentation that flows underneath Sean Penn's performance: from beginning to end, this movie is all about recording one's ideals whether this happens in the form of a public identity, personal tape recordings, photography, and so on and so forth. Maybe it was by accident, by I'm willing to give Gus the benefit of the doubt.<br /><br />I've always been a fan of Gus's flicks and he hasn't let me down this time. If you're looking for a nice little foray out of the typical popcorn movie lineup, check this film out. And with that...<br /><br />1. Does eating too much junk food really make you go crazy?<br />2. Who would be a better Harvey Milk: Robin Williams or Sean Penn? [Robin Williams was originally attached to the lead...fyi]<br />3. Is Sarah Palin the new Anita Bryant?<br /><br />P.S. Gus Van Sant's <span style="font-style: italic;">Milk</span> is up for a Golden Globe for Best Actor. Best of luck Mr. Penn.Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-7566754721572791562008-11-20T03:51:00.000-08:002008-11-20T13:04:05.320-08:00Zack And Miri Make A Porno<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRGCRGA5ZTXJO629T6gvtiwjMozrX_qW4Q6huYcFre0DFhsLDcIwK9lAsqedZDsew3JnC_rVMT81gArMXjJ1bPDYIQzLjc58fOEWWgXD__HY0RopLJzvCcbDZJ0Bh6slhNXAxZaEAGxis/s1600-h/zackandmiriamposter.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 135px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRGCRGA5ZTXJO629T6gvtiwjMozrX_qW4Q6huYcFre0DFhsLDcIwK9lAsqedZDsew3JnC_rVMT81gArMXjJ1bPDYIQzLjc58fOEWWgXD__HY0RopLJzvCcbDZJ0Bh6slhNXAxZaEAGxis/s200/zackandmiriamposter.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5270707195151946626" border="0" /></a><br />Preface: we are die hard Kevin Smith fans. We own his movies in various formats, met him personally, quote his flicks constantly [incessantly at times], and even own his books. Yes, we own books that contain the most inane and personal details most wouldn't want to know about any filmmaker or their closest of friends. For instance, Mr. Smith likes to beat off to nudies of his wife in the morning while said spouse sleeps or that he likes to play Nintendo DS while he takes his morning deuce. Needless to say, we spend a lot of our own personal life devouring anything and everything Kevin Smith. That being said, we were expecting a certain sort of movie out <span style="font-style: italic;">Zack and Miri Make A Porno</span>. But before we get ahead of ourselves..<br /><br />Kevin Smith's latest flick entails the story of two lifelong friends - Zack and Miri, natch - who find themselves unable to pay utilities bills and are on the verge of being homeless. As you might have guessed by this point, they decide to make their own porno with some friends and coworkers and all of a sudden you've got the first 15 minutes of the film. To quote Riley Freeman, "that's all you get for free." An extra $10-ish bucks is going to get you, in no particular order:<br /><br />1. Seth Rogen doing his standard Apatow improv<br />2. Nudity up to your asshole<br />3. Elizabeth "I like to do it myself" Banks<br />4. One of the most unbelievable bodily fluids sight gags ever caught on celluloid<br />5. Darryl from <span style="font-style: italic;">The Office</span>.. Enough said.<br /><br />Not a bad lot considering your admission price, but something is definitely amiss once you actually plop your ass down in one of those sticky theater seats and start taking in the flick. For one, the film oscillates too much between the fart/dick jokes that have become the norm for Smith films of late and the touchy-feely rom-coms laden with epic monologues that Kevin seems to have a soft spot for. Now, generally this isn't a bad thing, especially since I've long considered Kevin Smith an expert at whipping together a ridiculous mish mash of poop jokes, unconventional love stories, and witty banter all without seeming like he's another Apatow disciple. Perhaps Kevin somehow lost his usual barometer for judging what makes it past editing, or maybe it's hard to ignore the presence of improv-tongued Seth Rogen, but for whatever reason Zack and Miri often feels uncertain. Kevin Smith once noted that his style is that he "has no style." This is taken to the nth degree in Zack and Miri and at times - several to be exact - you can't even tell this is a Kevin Smith film at all. The intellectual, sharp dialogue isn't as a engaging, but it has its moments; the characters get developed, but in the end you just don't seem that invested in Rogen's pornographic quagmire; a lot of the jokes are toss away gags and honestly, seem too childish even for Kevin Smith's usual demographic.<br /><br />My qualms aside, Zack and Miri was a great watch. It might not have had the same effect <span style="font-style: italic;">Clerks</span> or <span style="font-style: italic;">Mallrats</span> or <span style="font-style: italic;">Dogma</span> had on me, but I'm more than happy to throw a little coin at Kevin. Job well done, albeit unorthodox, at least in Kevin Smith standards. Although I wasn't that surprised, Craig Robinson pretty much ran away with this movie. Every moment he's on screen is gold and definitely carries the film a long way.<br /><br />I might be a fan in denial, but I was able to ignore the bit of doubt clinging to the back of my head that maybe Kevin has lost it, maybe his time is up as a pioneer of honest, accessible moviemaking. But fuck that. If anything, I see this as a prime opportunity for Mr. Smith to start taking his stripped down visual style and proclivity to write humorous and thoughtful dialogue in other directions. His future projects include a sci-fi flick set in space and a thriller having to do with religious fanatics, both intriguing concepts and I hope he gets them off the ground. With that,<br /><br />1. No Ben Affleck cameo?<br />2. Although it looks like a lot of fun, how feasible is a double-dutch rudder in a live-fire bedroom scenario?<br />3. Is anal sex really the preferred laxative for porn stars?<br />4. Is Black Friday really a corporate racist conspiracy to keep the black man down?<br /><br />P.S. In case you're a horror junkie (like us), there are plenty of little zombie/Romero easter eggs in this flick. The Monroeville Mall, the hockey jersey Zack sports, plus a wonderful cameo from Sex Machine a.k.a. gore effects master Tom Savini!!Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-56224192244798637832008-10-12T13:08:00.000-07:002008-10-12T13:12:14.058-07:00Quarantine<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnD1mMVUEjRI-PvCmwmkUeXxb2-HWdKAidvaCg9Ren1NveO8daJ5Ec2wYPjFqvH2HfQCEbTwLAXM7iTtYT8XvTA3hw65qYHcR-e6Ro-UtxXGJXkLaYuKFOdbl0HHy3ibIDEWtZvjExuUQ/s1600-h/Quarantine_Poster_hr.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnD1mMVUEjRI-PvCmwmkUeXxb2-HWdKAidvaCg9Ren1NveO8daJ5Ec2wYPjFqvH2HfQCEbTwLAXM7iTtYT8XvTA3hw65qYHcR-e6Ro-UtxXGJXkLaYuKFOdbl0HHy3ibIDEWtZvjExuUQ/s200/Quarantine_Poster_hr.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256362704309109698" border="0" /></a><br />The long tradition of remaking foreign horror flicks hasn't let up this year, and since Halloween is right around the corner, we're not surprised that Hollywood's gobbling up every piece of celluloid it can get its greedy little hands on. That or it's milking franchises that should have shit the bed years ago [<span style="font-style: italic;">Saw V</span>, we're looking at you...] A year ago a Spanish flick named <span style="font-style: italic;">[REC]</span> hit the scene and got a positive reception from the world's horror buffs, thus lighting a fire under Hollywood's ass and BAM! <span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span> was born. The plot's pretty straightforward: Angela, a cutie newsreporter, and her cameraman shadow a team of very enthusiastic - and horny - firefighters in Los Angeles, they answer a 911 call involving an old woman in a sketchy apartment complex, and one neck-bite later, we're stuck in the middle of a P.O.V. pesudo-zombie shit show. As per usual horror flick standards, people foaming at the mouth and moaning in pain doesn't alert anyone that some real shit is about to go down. Once you get past the initial setup, <span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span> hits the ground running and you get caught up in the panic and frenzy that is pretty much the entire movie.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span> is probably one of the best horror flicks we've seen this year. Although it runs through the standard jump out of your seat moments, the fresh spin on a mysterious epidemic in a big city and the military's involvement combined our love for big guns and biological threats that need to be eliminated with sniper fire. <span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span> is terrifying, the premise is fairly believable, and it consistently delivers the scares even after you think you've seen it all. Granted the ending is a bit cookie-cutter, it'll give the typical moviegoer nightmares.<br /><br />Our complaints are few and far between. One of our major concerns going into this one was the gimmicky, vomit-inducing camerawork that goes hand-in-hand with these flicks. Recall <span style="font-style: italic;">Cloverfield</span> and that asshole who wouldn't put the fucking camera down and help kill some critters or <span style="font-style: italic;">Diary of the Dead</span> and the epic fail moment when the gang decides to charge their camera's battery in a hospital overrun with braineaters. We won't even mention <span style="font-style: italic;">The Blair Witch Project</span>.. Luckily, <span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span> does a good job of avoiding too much shaky cam and it doesn't look like it was filmed by someone with a bad case of palsy. Our other problem with this flick was the complete lack of a final girl scenario and unless you've been brushing up on your Carol Clover, we'll warn you now: this movie doesn't help the feminist cause in horror movies of late. If you're up for a nice scare, do yourself a favor, check out <span style="font-style: italic;">Quarantine</span>, and tell <span style="font-style: italic;">Saw V</span> to "suck it!!" And with that...<br /><br />1. Is the CDC really trained to fire M4s with red dot sights?<br />2. Are mad scientists always up to no good in their attics?<br />3. Is handball actually the preferred past-time activity for firefighters?<br />4. Does nightvision always make that badass <span style="font-style: italic;">Splinter Cell</span>/Buffalo Bill sound when it powers up?Nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12382875351198884340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4714190984451838480.post-4186745710805242722008-07-25T18:43:00.000-07:002008-12-11T08:27:02.828-08:00Rambo<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYNgBucX9tabirt-UfV1PPNLiN3A9rtQ91QdAYnexMQ9PYde8zghfcaEh7KHbvgdqMxubY767WdV_BMGzFuY-NEAURCgB3MNuKrCXUfX3jx97DgFIkXE2IMs-0al4OuzSxqHYYa9Sw7RM/s1600-h/200px-Rambowallpaperkr8.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYNgBucX9tabirt-UfV1PPNLiN3A9rtQ91QdAYnexMQ9PYde8zghfcaEh7KHbvgdqMxubY767WdV_BMGzFuY-NEAURCgB3MNuKrCXUfX3jx97DgFIkXE2IMs-0al4OuzSxqHYYa9Sw7RM/s200/200px-Rambowallpaperkr8.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5227135345856665826" border="0" /></a><br />First of all, the 4<sup>th</sup> Stallone Rambo film that came out earlier this year isn’t really called <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo 4</span>…its just <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>(despite how an imdb.com search for “<span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo 4</span>” yields this movie). You might be thinking “well damn, wasn’t the first one in the series called <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo</span>?” Nope– that would be <span style="font-style: italic;">First Blood</span>. Then after that you have <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo: First Blood part II</span>…and the oddly ironic desert combat installment featuring the Taliban would be <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo III</span>. If this was more than you cared to know about the <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>series you’re probably not alone. But we love details and also love Rambo, so we’re going to approach this review with a deep growling yell as if we ourselves were about to steer a tank into a Hind helicopter. <p class="MsoNormal">The film did moderately well, grossing a bit over $112MM internationally with a budget of $50MM. We thought this would be cool to review since it’s out on DVD and come on, it’s Rambo. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p>The story begins with choppy newsreels that establish the violence in <st1:country-region st="on">Burma</st1:country-region> (a.k.a <st1:country-region st="on"><st1:place st="on">Myanmar</st1:place></st1:country-region>) in a manner reminiscent of the intro to a zombie movie. So much so that you’re waiting for Johnny Cash’s “The Man Comes Around” to start up. But as bad as it looks, that a man (Stallone) will in fact come around, and kick everyone’s ass. This movie makes a good effort to bring the story of John Rambo out of the Cold War era and into the 21<sup>st</sup> century....we guess. Its slightly more creative than <span style="font-style: italic;">Behind Enemy Lines 2: Axis of Evil</span>.<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p>Here’s the plot – a group of ignorant American church volunteers travel into war-torn Burma to help peacefully change things but get caught, resulting in their manager hiring a team of mercenaries, escorted by Stallone, to break them out of a POW camp. How is Rambo even involved? The nihilistic ex-green beret who spends his time as a boat captain and trapping snakes for cash gave them a ride up the river.<br /></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p>This flick mixes feelings of guilt, anger, relief and gruffly-delivered one-liners in a non-stop action packed 1.5hrs. This one is also pretty dark, bringing up the uncomfortable connotations of civil war in 3<sup>rd</sup> world countries and the problems Americans face when they try to fix them (much like <span style="font-style: italic;">Tears of the Sun</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Black Hawk Down</span> or <span style="font-style: italic;">Blood Diamond</span>). It’s also hard to miss the struggle to reconcile violence in a religious and humanitarian setting – the film beats you over the head with a rock (pun intended) but falls short of reaching a conclusion. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p>They must have also brought on a new gore guy for this movie, because its way more graphic and gruesome. In my mind I can hear Nathan Explosion grumbling “Brutal…”. People are essentialy meat sacks, and explode like the oozing zombies in <span style="font-style: italic;">Planet Terror</span>. Add in a ton of guys, a boat vs. truck machine gun battle, a .50cal sniper rifle, a borderline rape scene and a knife kill, and you have a solid R rating. <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>also holds the record in the <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>franchise for the most kills, coming in at 262. Want some other ridiculously useless <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>stats? Check out <a href="http://www.geekstir.com/movies/rambos-kill-count/">this link</a>. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p>Also worthy of note – Stallone did a short Comcast spot explaining how this movie is about people in their most primitive state, morality, etc. which was interesting because none of those really come off clearly in the movie. <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo </span>was probably not intended for analysis, but if it makes it into a religious studies seminar out there let us know. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Questions we’re left with:</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="">1)<span style=""> </span></span><!--[endif]-->In what movie is the British SAS not badass?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="">2)<span style=""> </span></span><!--[endif]-->Wouldn’t backseat gun turrets have a depression safety feature?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="">3)<span style=""> </span></span><!--[endif]-->Our idea of a Stallone/Schwarzenegger combo for <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo: Commando II</span> = awesome? Thoughts?</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p><br /></o:p>p.s – Brace yourself for a <span style="font-style: italic;">Rambo V</span>…hell yea, its in pre-production</p>Spencerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03995154110658716370noreply@blogger.com1