Iron Man

By the time we’d seen this movie, we’d seen numerous TV spots, online trailers and lame-ass video game commercials, not to mention slashfilm had a post about this movie pretty much every day. We saw Gwyneth catch Tony Stark changing out of the Iron Man suit, but let’s face it, it wasn’t the worst thing she caught him doing. Such early, seemingly in-depth exposure to the film through these outlets gave us the fear that we’d seen it all. An example of this to cite would be the Die Hard 4 trailer, since it basically showed everything – McClane vs. Maggie Q, McClane vs. a helicopter, McClane vs. a truck, McClane vs. an F-35 fighter jet….etc. As Tobias so aptly put it, this trailer really got a little carried away, prematurely blew its wad and left itself with quite a mess in its hands – there was nothing left for viewers to “ooOOo” at.

Even though we’ve seen what a guy in a super suit can do, (yea Master Chief) Iron Man still felt pretty fresh. Having a fairly strong knowledge of comic books, we were definitely looking forward to seeing yet another comic adaptation on the big screen, but not for the best of reasons. Spider Man 3 was so disappointing [what the hell Raimi..] that maybe Marvel was just plain fucked. Jon "You're so money and you don't even know it" Favreau's take on Tony Stark was up in the air, since this was the first time he’d tackled a big summer blockbuster, but "goddamn!!” I say. The action beats come pretty quickly within the first few minutes: just after Downey establishes his suave, confident take on Tony Stark/Iron Man, US soldiers get owned quicker than the convoy attack in Clear and Present Danger. The backstory within the film isn't convoluted and we quickly forgot that this was a superhero flick from the same studio that produced Rise of the Silver Surfer and Hulk [shudder]. As comic fans we dug it. There are enough fanboy tid bits throughout the film to make the inner nerd in you feel like you were getting a lapdance from a gold-bikini-clad Carrie Fischer.

But even if this isn’t your cup of tea, and if the names Harvey Dent and Two Face seem as unrelated as David Caruso’s one-liners in CSI: Miami, have no fear! Because with a solid story, witty dialogue and believable acting, you could walk into this movie not knowing what the hell’s an “Iron Man” and not know any better. Even for a PG-13 flick, we get to see a shit ton of Iron Man beat downs, ginormous explosions, gratuitous sex [no Paltrow side boobs, sad face], and wait for it... Jeff "Mind if I do a J?" Bridges. Mr. Lebowski is by far, a perfect villain, baldness aside. The only let down by his performance was that not once did he ever drink a White Russian.

Iron Man's great. We couldn't have asked for a better start to this Summer's blockbusters. In fact, the film's done so well that it's sparked an influx of Marvel flicks up through 2011 [Captain America = McConaughey? Count us in!!] The less enjoyable parts of the movie were few and far between. This movie probably would have benefited from an R-rating: the whole "arms dealing kills innocent people halfway around the world" spin would have been a little more heartfelt if we were seeing arms and legs blown off little kids riding bicycles, but we understand graphic violence isn't always the best route, especially when you're in Marvel's position, trying to dig yourself out of a hole in the ground by selling more toys to said kids on bicycles. And with that…

Questions we're left with...

1. Why don’t all girls at Brown look like that reporter?
2. How did Tony Stark figure out the ice problem?
3. Why wasn’t that Burger King an In ‘n’ Out Double-Double?

PS – Stick around after the credits to catch a cool add-on to the plot. Don’t worry, it’s not as plot-upsetting as Xavier waking up in the body of a coma patient.